If I say the word SEX to you, what thoughts, feelings, and images come up for you? SEX is probably one of the most powerful words in our language, and the topic of SEX is highly charged. We still live in a culture (in Northern America) that is saturated in sex, and yet also highly conservative and terrified of it.
SEX is still a dirty word.
Many of my clients are struggling with feeling dirty on the inside when they try to engage sexually. My work is to help them reframe how they feel about sex, to embrace their goddess energy, and activate their lusciousness, using various techniques from Tantra, intentional creativity, and my own signature process.
Let me be honest right now: working to undo years of conditioning about sex, sexuality, your body, and female pleasure can be HARD. It can also be pleasurable, joyful, ecstatic, and transcendent. But don’t get me wrong, there is real work to do there because everybody receives it. You need to be extremely patient and gentle with yourself while consciously deciding that you
So I came across this post on Instagram that sums up how I feel about SEX and what I teach my clients:
SEX= Sacred Energy Xchange
Pretty hot, when you think of it that way, right?
If you think of SEX as rather than genitals rubbing together, but as a sacred energy exchange between 2 (or more!) people, suddenly the world opens up in so many delicious ways.
Isn’t everything SEX (Sacred Energy Xchange) of some kind?
You may already be familiar with the concept of working with energy. Maybe you trained in energy healing, you have regular reiki sessions, you like to clear your homespace of negative energy, and you practise Tai Chi or Qi Gong.
So, you can take this into your relationship with SEX too!
Remember that an energy exchange of any kind isn’t always all “love and light” either. It can be raw, deep, emotional, powerful, loving, angry, pent up, sensual, primal, or a mix of some or all of these things together.
Have you ever made love where suddenly you have a burst of emotion? You started crying, laughing uncontrollably, punching the bed. That’s an energy release, baby.
SEX is all about energy, so you need to get it moving.
I believe that all forms of human sexual behavior that is CONSENTING and between ADULTS, with care and concern, is sacred. (Please note the caveats there.)
You can have SEX just by gazing into your partner’s eyes, by the way you touch their body, by giving a massage, giving or receiving a yoni massage, by playing around with power dynamics, by being flogged or giving a flogging, and so, so much more.
What matters is the intention and the energy that goes into it, and that it is done with care and concern for your partner/s.
If you want to start embracing the energy of SEX, here’s a ritual on how you can create a sacred space for you and your lover:
- Set the scene by energetically clearing the room- you can use sage or incense, feathers, crystals, room sprays, or you can just pray. Use what you feel comfortable with to clear the space and remove any stagnant energy. Then set the intention for this to be a sensual, sacred space where everything is welcome.
- Beautify the space: light some candles, make the bed, scatter rose petals, set a rug down, light a fire if you have a fireplace. Make this room a cozy and sensual space where you feel safe.
- Come to center. Take a few moments to ground into your body and witness your breath. Place one hand over your heart and the other over your vulva and tune into your erotic energy.
- Imagine that you are pulling cosmic energy down from the universe into your pussy. Then imagine you are pulling all the delicious energy up from the earth into your pussy, and feel the energies of heaven and earth uniting.
- You may want to bathe before and anoint your body with sensual oils or lotion so you feel every inch a goddess.
- Place one hand over your lover’s heart, gaze into their eyes, and send them your love.
You can create your own Sacred Energy Xchange in any way you want, and however you want. I’d love to hear your stories and what sacred sexual rituals you practice!
If you’re ready to bring the sacred back into your sexuality and are committed to doing the work to clear your wounding, then I invite you to contact me. I work with women to help them become the most luscious and embodied versions of themselves to charge up their relationships.
You need to be ready, and I will only take on women who will do the work, because this process is not passive.